Optimist Versus Pessimist

Time to Pack

2009-03-18T16:23:00.001-07:00

They ask to remove the veil
But you can't if your not there
Stand silent, head bowed
We heard he called today
The man who gives you what you desire
Not I, who struggled in fire

Tar is hard to get out of

Cough your lungs and tear from smoke
The fears it does invoke
Dash silent, head bowed
You can't catch what you don't hear
Reach down as far as you can
Yet they still refuse your hand

The Quarry

2009-03-08T23:17:00.000-07:00

"But it's a hole in the ground?"

These walls of stone scale heights we could never climb
But jumping would be done in a heartbeat
Take a deep breath and scream
The echos great you with warmth and hospitality
The damselfly greets you with a kiss on the arm
As you row in this abandonment of man
Trees in the depths, suffocated by an entire lake

Whoa, wha ah oh ah ooooooh
Whoa, wha ah oh ah ooooooh

As we sing Against Me! at the top of our lungs
The walls reverberate our voices
Shaking the water
Causing the fish the shift

We've come here to feel like nothing matters
All of our problems still on the edge
Casting stones with every effort
And not one making it near

Mechanism

2009-03-05T10:48:00.000-08:00

Flick the domino and begin the chain
One falls after another like a wave in the sea
Black and white, tumbling
Until it hits the ball
The ball flows among elaborate tubes
And rotating devices
Gently and swiftly gaining speed
More things are moved
More things are pushed
Needles are shoved into balloons
Thread is set a blaze
Until it releases the brick into
my open, gaping mouth
A clay face explodes into shards
I attempt to pick up the pieces
But I look around
And everyone else is already busy picking up theirs
I've tried helping before
But I haven't found my mouth yet

No one else can find theirs either

Winter Formal (Homecomming pt. 2)

2009-02-26T23:17:00.000-08:00

My forehead is pressed against your door
My weight braced by my arms
The shadows even Carvaggio couldn't capture

Then suddenly my world falls

You open the door and I stumble into your arms
Only to look up and see the definition
Of surprised and concern
"I have been here for years!"
"Warm me with stories and company and alcohol!"
One finger you press to my lips
And set me down the couch
The fever shaking away from my bones
Till I close my eyes and sleep for the first time

Homecomming

2009-02-25T21:59:00.000-08:00

So what if I am at your door?
My hair clotted from the midnight rain
Clothes plastered to skin
Shoes becoming useless
I've walked what feels like years
My keys jingling all the way
My stomach rumbles
But I shrugged that off hours ago
How parting ways hurts like falling down stairs
Wake me from this coma
With the opening of your door
The warmth of the air melting icy hearts

We'll dance like teenagers who don't know any better
The way life needs to be cast aside more often

Geology

2009-02-19T23:44:00.000-08:00

Let's get this over with
My chest is bare
Waiting for these bullets to really sink in
But all that I can feel is the sweat on my brow
And I'm actually bundled in a coat
I haven't blinked in what seems a year
One in a million?
How about just one in one
But this one in one
Is missing those other millions
The colors are blurring their demands again
"Put us into words
You depend on it"

What is in my throat?
Feels like a stone.

It all starts with Crayola

2009-02-16T00:55:00.000-08:00

Picture perfect on a decaying Polaroid
Forever capture a smile
Longing for a time where things were not so clustered
"But it's all a part of growing up!"
So we can not wish then?
For a paradise in which creation does not have to result in income
Where building what is beautiful
Is created for only such that purpose
Not for profit
Not to continue living in this pre-fabricated room
Not for supply, not demand
But to be as being is
Graphite on paper
Paint on canvas
Words on a screen
Spray on concrete
Notes for the ear
Never pausing because of what is required
For the grade, to be measured to others
Create to create
Or destroy to destroy
Or mingle the two

I will stand here and look you in the eyes
"I will do this"
"Do not ever try to stop me"

The Sleeping Epic

2009-02-04T15:00:00.000-08:00

An Introduction:
Jack and Jill went up a hill
But there was no clean water
Only filth and rotten sludge
(Plus a hole in the pale doesn't help)

Insert your witty prelude
Be it an epic cacophony
Or a simple reading
Thus is the start of the beginning
With the end being refused for now

(An ode to our future strangers
We will fall in love with you)

Memories pre-crafted in a child mannerism
But what is junior high to elementary
Then just a tyrant of horror
Subjecting us to feelings we cannot control

Adhesive can work wonders
But look at the mess we've made on our clothes
Jack did not break his crown
Only his own heart as he waited for you

Emerge from the scenery
We thought you were merely the background
As fast as that familiar smile came
Vanished as ninety degrees does in a 2-D world

A chorus smothered in deja vu
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
We can't get over our stiff past
Tornadoes and storms and the simple objects
"Why cant you get used to it?"
"Same reason I can't get the dye out of my skin.
Everything will remain, layering forever high."

Serenade us with your interlude
Blow your kisses and flash that grin
Make these songs relevant
And destroy the mental pictures caused by others
Become the alcohol that has claimed so many before
Leave me drunk and begging for more
Make us flock
These birds won't quit!

...

If headaches were gold
I would be the prospector making a fortune

...

Descend the stairs in the pitch black night
Repeat your same mistakes
No matter how many time you've been here before
Another step to make you look like a fool

Satellites transfer the desperation
But you'll "have to call me back"
The sirens of the sea took many lives
The ambulances with their own wails attempt to save

The intangible scribbles
Crafted of graphite and the typing of keys
Causes Jill to tumble after
Would there be a conclusion?
Would there be a sequel?
Could a happy ending still exist?
A mangled Jack
A bruised Jill
Though covered in mud, stains, and regret
The raised white flag remains pure

(Our bodies our blank canvasses
what we do will tattoo the ugliest
yet most beautiful creation
no one would even be close to imagining)

Heavy Breathing

2009-02-02T16:45:00.000-08:00

Put your shovel away
I would not recommend digging deeper
It's a deep hole filling with fog
A well that wishes but does not grant

One most lower themselves to create
But how come I cannot when I am raised?
A perpetual cycle
A ferris wheel
It's groundhog day
Again and again
But these extra weeks tack onto each other

Turning your brights on in this wispy air
Only makes it harder to see

We're No Different

2009-01-24T16:46:00.000-08:00

Command and C
Command and V
One in a million, but one of another million ones
You cannot shrug off quicksand
"Getting deeper, and deeper, and farther still"
Pull yourself out
Brush it off
And jump right back in
Cup to your lips
Time to celebrate forgetfulness
Only to have the morning bring with it Breakfast and your memory
Hand in hand with recollection

Drink up, that sand aint going down without a fight

Battlethargic

2009-01-21T00:05:00.000-08:00

The build up of crude matter in hair
The formation of plague
Your body is telling you it's time to wake again
Grab the spear
They say the cynics will be shown their place
You cannot cover oil with water
Optimist versus pessimist wages with smiles and tears
Dry contacts from being awake
Irrigation brings irritation
Adjust the camera lens
What will it say about this moment
An under-developed notion
Over exposed with saturated hope

I could Warhol this entire experience using every color in the world
But it's always the same stencil

A Registered Trademark

2009-01-13T23:09:00.000-08:00

Two steps backwards with no steps forward
Right into that hole you dug yourself a long time ago
Fill it with the salt of ocean sized regret
Become one with the shark
You don't have a choice
Your open mind has lured them to this spot already
Don't bother going for the eyes
They are already blind
They are already deaf
They can't smell a thing
They welcome you with open jaws
No counting chickens regardless of hatching
You've already crossed this road way too often
In a static image would you weep?
Or would a smile cower in your lips?
Show those pearly whites
This happiness with be your trademark
Branded like cattle
Be proud! tm

Honey, though I can feel every tooth embed my fragile flesh, it'll hold like concrete
Thanks for the support (beams)

A little less than 360

2009-01-10T10:43:00.000-08:00

The burn of alcohol
Since childhood still rings true
Confess your inner secrets
Or make new ones you'll never remember
No one likes the taste
But excess solves that
I can't taste this
I can't taste your lips
Maybe I just don't have good taste at all

I can't feel that I can't feel my toes

(Am I dizzy from our loss, or from the actual spinning I just did)

Florida is on fire

2009-01-09T23:19:00.000-08:00

Take back what is ours...

The yachts bob with a smirk
Voices telling you who is successful

Sand in your toes
Shells cutting your feet
Salt burning the wounds

The air ripe with desperation
Wander the roads
An end is buried in concrete and glass
We love to recycle your problems!

The Ice Cometh

2008-12-29T00:16:00.000-08:00

My feet are numb
And today, I don't care
This ice cracks beneath me
As I test its stability
"Can you hold my weight!?"
It cannot
But fortunate to me, it is only the ice on the grass
The lake is the future

Wind whipping a smiling face
Hands grip the chain of the swing
Lost feeling in those an hour ago
But my face will never go
Muscles being warmed with every syllable

Ice will makes boys out of men

Caroling

2008-12-26T00:19:00.000-08:00

Ding, It's that time of year again
No, not Christmas
The part that comes after
The giving is gone, the food finished
The Salvation Army has packed up their bells
Scrooge goes back to bed with a greedy smile
The companies pat their bellies with the good tides of consumers
What is left but cold
And the soon to come New Year
Where people begin to forget the past year
In a blur of bottles and a giant glowing ball
Should I quake with the implied difference I am expected to feel?
Resolutions meant to start revolution

Should not of have had that last drink
I already forgot my promises

Hexagonal

2008-12-18T22:58:00.000-08:00

Perfect six-fold symmetry collides with my face
These Kama-kazi crystals ruined by the heat of my breath
But soon they work together
First reaching my knees in collective organization
Numbing my feet as a traverse like a lead statue
Trying to hide inside myself
I haven't seen the sky in days
And with every attempt, my eyes are ambushed
Body heat failing, lips the perfect purple

Come find me when the Spring commits the murder
Of solid to liquid and to eventually gas

Stop me if you've heard this one

2008-12-17T01:05:00.001-08:00

The two drink minimum
Perhaps it is to make the comedian
More enjoyable then they really are

Or maybe, it is the create an illusion
The comedian speaks the truth
A truth the average human does not understand

All the roosters and all the hens
cross roads with a second take

Look past the joke and see existence in its very essence is comedy

Disection

2008-12-16T00:41:00.001-08:00

Let the records show the subject is exposed:

He blinks because he is programmed
His heart beats off tempo
He dreams because he is simple
He dreams because he is complex

His handshakes are weak because he fears aggression
The same is said of his kiss
A human must crave desire
An animal must crave desire

His lips are chapped
His eyesight poor
His mind is grabbing hold of color and word and image
And like the soldier facing opposition of tenfold
Desperately tries to finally become immortal

Dear

2008-12-15T01:24:00.000-08:00

Mr. Songwriter
Your words, though spoken in some foreign city
Become relevant or even more distant
Let it be the next sappy love song
I can apply to a new sweetheart
Or the tearing of the sinews
Of your sung tragedy

Mr. Artist
Your brush strokes or your editing
Make me want to weep
Or rip the very canvas from the wall
Wishing to never blink as to view ever after
Or gouge out my eyes to never see again

Ms. Writer
Your pen scribbles stain the paper
With words of metaphorical genius
Or callused irony shredding my brain
Makes me want to dog ear this page
Or burn the manuscripts to forever rid

First Stones

2008-12-14T23:26:00.000-08:00

The way I pound the door
Is the way boxers desperately battle
Bruises erupt like the tears of shattered lovers

The running water is burning cold
How can such a slew of words
Be the slingshot of the first, cast stone

Pebbles may be pebbles
But in an avalanche of this magnitude
Those minor stones become bullets

Scalpel please?

2008-12-13T01:08:00.000-08:00

Please doctor
Amputate everything I've known
I don't want a mere phantom limb
I want the ghost of a former self
Take this artificial contraption
Put something with a pulse
I want to bleed like normal
Not in dam breaking manner
These faulty valves were not gauged properly

I taste rust in my mouth

Cheers

2008-12-12T01:26:00.000-08:00

My glass is half empty
Yours is half full
Why don't we just come together
and overflow this damned cliche
The chime of contact
How sad of a sound
Half-hearted wrists
Limply strive for a reason

The new year is upon us
And Ben Gibbards' word ring truer
Then anything I've ever heard before.

Send Out Signal

2008-12-06T17:32:00.000-08:00

Frantically tap the keys
I haven't heard a thing in years
Just a gentle fuzz
Like that of security
Except this is a horror film
Something has, and still going wrong
Oh yeah, there were others here
But you know how that goes
Or should I say how they go
It's really been uneventful
Keep trying different batteries
Nothings taking well
Some die right up
Some corrode right through
No one is responding
I haven't even heard one cry of names
Search parties too old school?
Big game must be on again

Am I blind or was a dark, secluded, creaking, rotting, and deserted home the single greatest idea we've ever had?

Guys?

(Would you stop breathing down my neck?
I get it, okay?
Killer monster thing.
Whatever.)

Doo-Khaki

2008-11-30T23:06:00.000-08:00

These spotless shoes are filthy
A healthy dose of callus' greet me every evening
Does one look for a new pair?
Look at the variety!
Look at this gaudy plethora of options!
Must I test this ones stamina?
Will this match my personality?
I bend down to tug my tattered laces
But alas my fingers are tangled
Mangled if you will exaggerate
These shoes will keep on treading
Until the soles decide to sleep

The Taste

2008-11-23T20:02:00.000-08:00

When you throw up rainbows
It drains you of color
A technicolor concoction
Joesph and his damn coat would be jealous of
Brilliant hues of sadness
Shadows of happy ideas

(An art teacher somewhere just flinched at the irony)

Toobin'

2008-11-19T00:28:00.000-08:00

This life preserver doesn't feel right
So white, so bright
Yet so dark in these waves
Bobbing around
Awaiting rescue
It's not the sharks that get you
but that cold, sinking feeling

He is. I believe him.

2008-11-11T16:25:00.001-08:00

Mercury

2008-11-10T22:49:00.000-08:00

The down trodden-face
Accepting yet relentless for a different answer
A sweat stained steering wheel of trips past
The speakers fizz with every beat
Where are we going
No signs, no remaining distance
Just cracking glass and
the draining of work
Chapped lips and
A hoarse voice come well equipped
The phone was purposely drained
But its presence ever needed
The sound of hot concrete
Waves of tortured road
Contacts are drying up
but becoming wet even more

ANALOGY TIME

2008-11-07T09:20:00.000-08:00

Life is like swimming in a pool with friends
Light hearted chatter
The sun warming the water
Floating in the ripples of a man made sea
Weightless
Thoughtless
Boundless
Calmness
Then someone picks up a pool noodle
And with a leap through the air
Home runs your face with colorful hurt
Who knew foam could be so painful

Cocoa for kookoo puffs

2008-11-03T22:35:00.000-08:00

Where am I?

"Please quiet down"

How can you hear me?

"Get your hand out of your face"

What? My hand is by my side, sweating and clutching.

"Please be respectful"

How can I when I feel ridiculous?

"Use your inside voice"

How can I not when it's in my head?

"Calm down, sir"

Wow I'm about to start fuming in here

"No smoking please"

(Got you there, bub)
(Bub? Really?)

Sucktoberfest

2008-10-30T15:06:00.000-07:00

Blow out your candles!
Grab your mask!
Take my hand!
We'll burn it down!

Break out the coats!
Get your scooter!
Close your eyes!
Learn to fly!

Break the damn!
Collect yourself!
Run your mouth!
It's almost over!

(That can't be safe)
(At least he's getting out)

How to fly

2008-10-28T18:42:00.000-07:00

Teeth clenched
Foot stomping
Fist tightened
Eyes blank
Noise maddening
Throat swelling
Skin shrinking
Always waiting

Your A Little Off

2008-10-27T20:34:00.000-07:00

"What's going through your mind?"

An idea, slowly dragging, floating
No legs, no heart. no eyes, but blinking
Like looking at a reflection on glass
Mirrored yet translucent
It makes this noise
Like fingernails on a guitar string
Throbbing to a horrific beat
Someone please turn him down

Eventually it'll blossom into something beautiful, or something even worse
You win some, you lose some

Smear Me Dear

2008-10-26T19:03:00.000-07:00

Graphite rubbed into palms
Paint staining the skin
Eyes fatigued, sensitive
Colors turn grey

Pixels burning out
Is this a mesh or a gradient
Tutorials lead only to walls
Or nowhere at all

They need keyboard shortcuts for this

(They do, it's called ctrl+ alt+ dlt)

(If you even consider listening to him make sure to hit cmnd + s first)

Scents of Humor

2008-10-24T13:05:00.000-07:00

It's ironic it's called chicken scratch
Who knew it would take this much courage to write a letter
Excuse the mess
I placed grass and dirt from that place we hung out in this envelope
Perfume doesn't make me think of you
It might be the old cigarettes and chlorine
Whoever invented the seals on envelopes
Knew how to skew even the prettiest face

("Mr. Cougar, Mr Owl; What causes the ability of the substance on stamps to cause the chemical bonding strength of the adhesive to be engaged by saliva?")

("Something about beetles, or that look she's giving me. Let's ask wikipedia!")
("Where are your parents?")

Sploosh

2008-10-24T10:46:00.000-07:00

6 a.m. is a beautiful time.
The perfect mirrored lake, the reflection of the skies and trees, suspending the visual in infinity.

"Two skips."

The fog hangs as the trapeze artist.
The insects rub their weary eyes and traffic to their routine.

"Six skips!"
"That was only four!"

Clean air Chicago residents wouldn't believe.
Clean air we don't even believe.

"You have to make the rock hit parallel, like this."

We are the fish who don't have to worry about the fisherman

(When you throw a lot of rocks, it sounds like machine-gun fire, HOORAH)

To Begin Proves Progress

2008-10-23T22:33:00.000-07:00

(Ice chips, cold grips)
(Dry mouth, tear drought)

"Why?"
"I need time. I am the soldier under fire"
"You are no soldier!"
"We all are in this war of compassion"

(Mr. Owl, why do tears taste salty?)

(Quit asking me questions)